Het behouden huis by Willem Frederik Hermans

As the partisans leave the ravaged house behind, the narrator – who has ditched his disguise and merged back into the group – lobs a hand grenade into the hallway, completing the devastation. The German colonel is strung up with piano wire. When the Germans lose control of the town once more, the victorious partisans go on the rampage and raid the house, slashing paintings and relieving themselves in vases. Terrified of being exposed as an impostor, the partisan kills them both in cold blood. That is what I understand by culture!’ The Dutch partisan seems to be on to a good thing until one day he is accosted by a man who turns out to be the rightful owner of the house.

The German colonel maintains a stiff upper lip and a breezy disposition amid the wartime carnage: ‘Since joining the army I have shaved every day without fail at exactly half past six in the morning. They take the first-person protagonist to be the owner and coerce him into providing the soldiers with lodgings. German forces recapture the town and come knocking at the door. This grand residence seems almost untouched by the war, and the partisan assumes the role of the owner, dressing in clothes he finds in the wardrobe and feasting on the food left in the kitchen. A Dutch soldier fighting with the partisans – a motley band of volunteers from disparate countries – comes across an abandoned house and takes shelter there during a lull in the hostilities.

Het behouden huis by Willem Frederik Hermans